There
was a little shindig here, on camera, five days ago. One of my few
surviving family members, God bless his soul, decided to teach me a
lesson. With the cooperation of every contact connected to me that
he could produce, and the help of a nearby neighbor with underworld
ties, they threw me a party. It seemed like a fun thing, until it
became apparent it wasn't a party in my honor. Of course I was aware
of none of the details at the time.
A
large retinue of bongo beating Asian martial artists arrived just as
all the fun started to take on a sinister tone. Fights broke out
outside in about a dozen places. There were people who barely made
it away from here with their lives, but some of them may never be the
same again. I was lucky. My closest friend in the underworld, and a
few of my close friends who are nothing but intelligent and
righteous, happened to be here. Thanks to their assistance I did not
join the casualty list.
By
morning there was almost no evidence anything happened here, but I
would stake my life on the fact that a few people died out in the
street here that night. Their brethren carried the bodies away, just
as police began locking down all the streets. As far as I know
nobody was arrested. It happened so fast all the major carnage was
over before the first siren could be heard. All participants
vanished into the woodwork before the hammer of justice could fall.
If
it weren't for the close friends I had here who were witnesses, I
would say I dreamed the entire thing. That and the fact that there
were ongoing confrontations in broad daylight the next day between
neighborhood attendees. I would never question the validity of any
of my memories on the subject, except for some extenuating
circumstances.
I
ate some food that some people brought. I did not know, but it was
laced with high content THC. I have not partaken of weed voluntarily
in a good long while, but I found myself laughing like a school kid
at the stupidest things, for days. That sort of clued me in. There
were other substances involved in lacing the food and drink given to
me (none of which was alcoholic – I no longer drink).
Late
that Saturday night, after the streets were empty, the evidence that
I had also been dosed with a hallucinogen piled up so high it became
impossible to ignore. Demons and devils and vast enactments of a
damned infernal play paraded through my studio house. This was not
some average, run of the mill, childish foray into seeing pretty
colors and watching moving objects leave tracers. This was a divine
“comedy” (read “horror”), and the subject matter had at its
heart a concerted effort to take me down to hell.
I
called bullshit on the whole thing. I disbelieved and conquered all
fear. I time and again changed my surroundings to prove the
hallucinations were just that, but they just kept coming. I'm not
going to go into the details of all I saw and heard, except to say
that Tuesday night, October 7, I did finally lose my composure and
walked as quickly as I could to the nearest Catholic church (2 miles
away). I spent the entire night hunkered down in the vestibule,
waiting for dawn for what by then was evil incarnate and a huge
entourage of minions to be burned away in the sunlight. One must
never look at them by choice, but by the time it is very
difficult not to see them one is in very real danger.
Today,
five days later, it finally stopped. I don't know who did that to
me, but they should know something. Dosing somebody with a pupil
enlarger is the lowest, most cruel thing somebody can do to a former
user. I harbor them no ill will. I just hope that one day they
realize the absolutely wrong nature of their actions, and that the
full weight of guilt opens their eyes.
I
wanted to open a portal into the underworld in order to learn secrets
kept there, and I did open the portal. I entered but was not able to
leave unscathed. I barely retained my sanity. I learned enough to
fight against the power of evil when it comes looking for me,
although when the oldest evils come there is no way to fight, flight
is the only option. Either that or absolute motionlessness until the
sun is well above the horizon, and I am too crippled to remain
motionless that long.
I tried not to learn chants and calls and counter calls for games devils play, but
I learned that damnation is a very real thing. I was forgiven for my
actions, and then I was absolved, but I still feel the need to atone
and continue making amends, because the things I did were the
weightiest, most dangerous things a human being can do. If I had not
been either innocent or in good graces, each time something like this
happened, there is no doubt in my mind the best that could have been
hoped for was that my body would have been found later.
I
could not give a rat's ass if readers believe me. I hope you don't.
I hope you think this is a hokey, assed up attempt to get attention,
or that I am simply insane. Because that means you won't try to do
any of the things I did. I will never give clues about how I
learned, nor will I ever provide any assistance of any kind to
imperil another person's soul. Also, just to be fair, there is a
99.9% chance this is mere insanity, and even if it isn't me who is
that, the entire thing is definitely crazy. I call it life.
I
urge you to cast aside any immature problems you may have with
religion, and at least make an effort to get in God's good graces.
You never know when something might happen to you, some accident, if
there is such a thing, or some act against you. What could it
possibly hurt to give yourself a little insurance? Nothing. It
could only help you, at the worst.
Repent or Die